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Chapter Four - The Empty bench.

As many of you will know I went to Snowdonia for the week with my Dad to be in the area where my Mums ashes are spread so we could pay our respects one year on, and visit many of the places we had happy memories of her.

I was also there to train for and recce the official route for the GB Ultras Snowdon 50 mile ultra marathon in September which I am doing to raise money for two charities very important to my Mum and myself.

The first day of the recce runs was actually on the first anniversary of my Mums passing on the 2nd June, and was very humbling for me and also very important to be in Snowdonia at that particular time.

I am fundraising for Lupus Uk because that is one of the conditions my Mum suffered from, and it is often a debilitating condition with no known cure and is one condition that robbed my Mum of her enjoyment of the great outdoors in her later years.

I am also fundraising for the Llanberis Mountain Rescue Team, because they do tremendous life saving rescue work in and around Snowdonia, a place my Mum loved so much, and they are entirely voluntary and unpaid. They are called out everyday and often multiple times and put their lives at risk to save others all the time.

Top of Snowdon, looking down at the ridge/route I have just climbed up.

After being up Snowdon twice that week and up multiple other mountains in the area as well I can appreciate how difficult the terrain is for rescues of people injured, especially when mostly they have to be stretchered out.

I spent the first two days of the week away on officially organized recce runs of some of the sections of the official 50+ mile route. It was an eye opener to say the least, with a scrambling climb most of the way up Tryfan to start, which although only a mile in distance by the time we got to our resting point near the summit it had actually taken us over an hour!

We went on from there and went up Snowdon too via the Pyg track which is rocky all the way up and as we were running bits here and there it was a lung buster and leg buster to say the least.

The enormousness of the task involved in September was starting to sink in, and stratergies on how I am going to get through it all were starting to be re-evaluated in my head. I was beginning to seriously doubt my ability to complete the challenge.

Day two's recce runs were easier and shorter apart from the initial scrambling climb up the ridge of Pen y Ole Wen which again left me needing regular breaks on the climb up as we were indeed climbing this section and not running due to it's technicality and steepness. Great views on the way up though, and a real appreciation and love of the area was beginning to form within me.

As the official recce run for that day finished at Lunchtime I decided to take a brief snack break and then press on on my own and take on Gylder Fach and Gylder Fawr and then the descent down to Nant Peris, eventually walking into Llanberis to get picked up by my Dad.

At the very start of the climb up. That's me with the grey cap.

I spent the rest of the week doing my own recce runs of the bits of the route we didn't cover so I knew at least in my head where we were going in the race itself, as there were a lot of footpaths and taking wrong turns and losing time and gaining mileage was not something I wanted to suffer.

I am extremely grateful to my Dad for his patience during the week, as he would drop me off before lunch at wherever I requested and then come back again at teatime to again pick me up where I requested. This suited us both as I could get on with my climbing, hiking or running taking valuable pictures as I go, and Dad could go off where he wanted or merely go back to the farmhouse we where staying in to chillout and rest and reminisce about his previous times there with my Mum.

I only intially planned to do the official two days of recce runs and an additional one to cover the recce run day earlier in the year I had missed. That one covered the area too and from Betws y Coed. But my legs were fully recovered everyday I got up and my confidence grew daily that I may yet be able to complete the challenge ahead.

This ultimately led to me doing recce hikes/runs everyday bar Monday, which was a walk day to Dinas Dinlle beach and then onto Caernarfon and back which ended up being a 16.5 mile trek on what was recovery day.

On the other days I climbed up Gylder Fach, Gylfer Fawr, Elinir Fawr, Y Gant and on Wednesday I did the Betws y Coed section back and out as such totalling 20.9 miles by the time I had extended the route to get me back to Llyn Ogwen for pick up.

Thursday I went up Snowdon again to take more pictures as it was a clear day and to recce a tough section of the route we missed the other day. This route has some amazing views and again ws a fairly technical route. By the end of the week I had totalled 91 miles and over 25,000 ft of climb.

It was tough , but it was fun, and this wasn't even the top.

On the penultimate day of the stay I wanted to do a remembrance walk around the areas I used to go with my Mum on our family holidays. This would include the holiday cottage we used to stay at and the walks in the vicinity that we would undertake daily, and also past the caravan site we used to stay at in our younger childhood days before we changed to the cottage for stays.

This route would ultimately lead me up to the spot where my Mums ashes have been spread so that I was able to pay my respects and spend some time with Mum.

The route itself was just over 8 miles if I remember rightly and it started in Llanberis by the lakeside. It was an adventure itself at some points as I tried to find the right path up the hillside on the opposite side of Llyn Padarn past the disused quarry clearly visible from Llanberis.

After a few re routes due to my curious nature of 'What's up this path?' I eventually found the vital footpath I was looking for. This is the footpath we used to walk with Mum from the cottage down to either the waterfall/stream halfway or the entire way down to Llanberis itself.

It was at this point I started to feel really sad that Mum wasn't able to get up these paths in her later years and enjoy the places she truly loved. I was sad that she was no longer there with me on the walk, and then the tears started. Walking and tearing up at the same time isn't a good idea as you can't really see where you are going especially with contact lenses in, and starting to fall over rocks and tree routes was now becoming an hinderance, so I fought the tears and pressed on.

The Empty Bench

One of the first places I stopped at for a rest turned out to be one of the viewpoints we would often stop at with Mum to admire the views over to Llanberis, and to our left Snowdon itself. As I started to take more pictures I was struck by the significance of the 'empty bench' and the view beyond. This again hit me as I could picture in my head my Mum sat on this bench enjoying the views and the almost peace and quiet of me and my brother causing mischief behind her, no doubt attacking each other with big sticks or twigs etc that we had found along the way on the path.

I carried on and thankfully managed to find the stream and it's little cascading waterfalls it creates on it's journey down the hillside on it's way down to the lake itself Llyn Padarn. I stopped here for awhile and took a moment as I talked to Mum, and I also took some pictures and little videos of the stream to show my brother to remind him of the spot.

Further on up the hillside I eventually popped out onto the road, although at what appeared to be a slightly different spot than I remember, but it couldn't of been far off. I suddenly realised that it has effectively been at least 25 years since I have been to that footpath and that side of the hillside, and a lot of trees have grown there since and taken over a lot of the once fairly open areas.

I found the holiday cottage further down the lane and just about found the start of the little footpath that went up the hillside to a big rocky outcrop that we used to go up to in the evenings to again admire the views. It was one me and my brother used to undertake with our Mum on an almost daily basis.

The problem this time was it was very overgrown and clearly not used much anymore and after 5-10 minutes started to become unfamiliar and go down the opposite side of the hillside without going up to the rocky outcrop. I turned round and started back and bumped into a local walking his dog. I asked him about a footpath up to the highest point but he wasn't familiar with it. It seems it has been abandoned over the years and the hillside has taken over it with new undisturbed growth and lots of youngish trees.

Bushwhacking fromoutcrop to outcrop was getting me nowhere.

I became very disappointed with myself that I couldn't find it, especially as it was one of the spots my Mum had initially requested her ashes spread, but we knew there was no way we could get Dad up that path, and it was now clearly a good idea that we hadn't tried as we would never of found the spot I was now looking for.

I spent 45 minutes or so bushwhacking my way through brambles, ferns, trees, gorse and all kinds of bushes trying to find rocky outcrops that looked familiar. I found a few but none of them felt like the right one. I sadly had to give up as I felt I am not going to be able to trample through the wilderness for hours on end, and I'm pretty sure Mum was telling me off for damaging the plants underfoot as I was doing so.

I eventually came down the hillside and went past the top end of Llyn Padarn and took a few familiar pictures and then headed over to the opposite hillside to make my way up to Mums spot.

The view down Llyn Padarn towards Llanberis

This route now took me up alongside Bryn Bras Castle and Bryn Teg caravan park where we stayed as children and it always feels good to be back there. Fast hiking as I was was really convenient as it saved me time and allowed me to fully appreciate views and stop to take pictures as I went. I took over 500 pictures over the week and it took me hours each night collating them into files on my PC and indeed slowly uploading them to Facebook for others to see and appreciate.

Once past Bryn Bras Castle and the campsite I was know on the hillside and at Mums spot. I had a late Lunch there and took more photo's including a 360 degree view mini video on my phone to show the stunning scenery around the spot.

Again I chatted to my Mum as such, although I knew I don't really need to talk to Mum about what I am doing as I know she is watching over me from above in the place she deserves to be. I also noted the lovely hillside flowers that were growing where Mum's ashes had been spread, nature at it's best.

Nature at it's best at Mum's spot.

I moved on from here and headed along the hilside towards Llanberis as I knew the road comes out there. I passed a few more disused quarries as I went and wondered if I had any need for a bit of good quality slate as there was clearly lots available here. Common sense told me I didn't really need any and I certainly didn't need the extra weight in my back pack on a hot day.

Finally I finished in Llanberis and after a nice little pitstop sat outside a local tearoom for a well earned coffee and cake I went off looking for Dad as I was a little early. Funnily enough I saw him drive past as I was drinking my coffee, so I knew he was around. I found him outside an ice cream parlour in his car enjoying a local ice cream, clearly we are very alike and it was no coincidence that the two of us got on well together on what was effectively the first holiday with just the two of us.

It is now no holds barred as I try and prepare myself for the task ahead in September and the fund raising push begins, and I do hope you will support me either vocally or with a small donation to one of the two charities I am doing it for, I will post the links below.

It is important to mention that the main reason I am doing the Snowdon 50 ultra is in memory of my Mum. I am doing it in her honour and via the 'wwmd- what would Mum do?' on going fundraising legacy dedicated to my Mum.

All donations go direct to the charities mentioned and also show up on the total figure raised so far by 'wwmd-what would Mum do?' . So far it has raised £1886 excluding gift aid.

God Bless you all, and thank you from the bottom of my heart for following me on this journey, and indeed for spending the time to read about my beloved Mum.

Mums view.

Fundraising links:


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